The One about My Brother

I promised my brother that I would give him a shout out soon, seeing as our sister, nephews and nieces have all scored a mention. So here it is, the post dedicated to.......My Big Brother Ted.

Now I have referred to my big brother as ‘Brother Ted’ for as long as I can remember. Whilst he doesn’t resemble a teddy bear (his limbs are far too long) like say, maybe Paddington Bear, he is a very friendly fellow. (actually I can’t recall if Paddington was friendly, I just had no other bears come to mind except for that rather startled looking one on Play School, and the Play School version bear I’ve never actually heard utter a word– therefore that bear surely does not resemble my sibling) He is also a much snappier dresser than Humphrey too come to think of it, Humphrey being another of your silent types, again, not bearing any resemblance to big brother in that department.

Brother Ted I often think of as a male version of myself, in that we are both tall, good looking and fabulous. We also obviously talk ourself up a lot to hide any insecurities and if in doubt we make a joke. And for the most part, that gets us by. We really are very similar, apart from the obvious fact he is male and that he would rather put hot pokers through his eyes than listen to my choice of music. We both share an amazing ability to drink, (what’s amazing about it is that we have both been honing our drinking skills for years and still can’t hold it very well), an inability to have more than $10 to our name more than 24 hours following pay day, as well as a love of the written word (or a love of our own drunken ramblings and voice)

The big T is going to be super chuffed to find this post I know, because we also love anything that is all about us. (our theory being that as we don’t currently have partners we must therefore make ourself the most important person in our world. Actually...even with partners we find ways to validate this point, as we both feature a remarkable skill in being able to talk our way out of anything)

I have watched Brother Ted entertain us with stories numerous times and been taken aback by the similarity of the expressions we carry on our faces and our hand movements as we try to relive the tale to our listeners (in other words, we wave our arms around a lot as we shout and we look funny) I feel like he has stolen my look, only to remember he is older than me so maybe it was the other way round. Subconsciously growing up I think I watched and somehow absorbed the same mannerisms as he.

We also both resemble windmills when we dance, and are generally the first ones on the floor intent on showing off our moves. (In other words we are quite shameless, and due to long limbs tend to take up the majority of the floor whilst we swing the said limbs around in wild abandon)

We both sing loudly (it all about projection remember) and rather badly, and we both refuse to shut up even when asked, begged or pleaded to by friends to be silent. We think we sound grand and maybe they are tone deaf, and as it’s all about us.....we just keep right on belting out the tunes.

Brother Ted lives in Sydney and leads what appears to be a fast exciting life however, whereas I live on the outskirts and break out into a sweat at the thought of traffic. He also parks a car with much more finesse than I do. (amusingly, at one stage I drove a thumping 5.4 litre V8 ute though and he drove a smart and spanky Golf Polo. This somehow fits us, but probably sounds wrong to the outside world). Brother Ted is also, like me, fanatically neat. I even once discovered his magazines on the coffee table were filed in date order. This still amazes me and I still tell people about it. (amazes me because I didn’t realize till that point there was someone else in the world even tidier than I was)

Apart from the many amusing traits of Brother Ted (including once managing to break his hand and wrist into approximately 856 pieces during a drunken game of backyard cricket) Brother Ted also plays an important role in bucking me up when I’m feeling down and making me look on the bright side of life (even if it means we have to laugh at his expense sometimes in the process) Brother Ted can pull the sun out for me when its raining to remind me what it looks like, and in short, Brother Ted makes a brilliant Pollyanna.

I hope he has enjoyed this ‘blob’ all about him, and I hope tonight this post finds him dancing somewhere with reckless glee, with his arms going everywhere, a drink in one hand and a cigarette in his other (with an innate ability to not spill a drop I might add) singing his head off loudly and badly with a smile as wide as the harbour bridge. For that vision right there folks…is my Brother Ted.